The very last day

Well Girls, here we sit at the end of another year. I always have

mixed emotions on New Years Eve. It means I've turned another

year older. Sometimes I'm excited because it means- whoo made

it through another. Mainly I'm happy because it symbolizes a

fresh new start. Not a new start alone because He is my Guide.

I may not always let Him do the guiding but a start of a brand

new year reminds me that's the seat He is suppose to be in and

not me.

I wish our Guide would make things this easy...

We sat one year and a day ago wondering what the road ahead

looked like. Would it have many twist and turns or maybe it

would be a little straighter this year. One thing I know...that He

blessed me with some wonderful traveling companions this year.

And for you I'm ever grateful!! So thanks for riding out this year

with me. It definitly had some suprises and disappointments

along the way....I'm glad you were here. I can't wait to see what

He has planned for each of us this year!!

Happy New Year everyone!! Much love to you all!

A Simple Box by Nature?

A simple box by nature.
It arrived some where around a week ago.
Just above the address was a note reading...
"do not open until Christmas Day!".
Is she kidding me wait a whole week!!
See "she" is a kindred spirit sent to me as a gift from
Someone above. So knowing her I already knew I
would love what was in that simple brown box. I
couldn't wait to open it!! And open it I did tonight and
my anticipation was correct...for great treasures it did
contain.
This past Sunday night our church held it's Candle Light
Service. The sanctuary was dimmed and the white
Christmas lights were a glow. As I slipped into a pew
just ahead of a new sweet friend. The church began to
fill with the sweet sounds of Christmas Hymns. The
sweet friends baby began to coo and laugh...oh, the kind
that would make any heart melt. Then the voices around
began to sing "Away in a Manger". My melted heart began
to ache that same ache that Mother's Day brings for me.
The line in the song..."the cattle are lowing the baby awakes
but little Lord Jesus no crying he makes" with the cooing of
the baby behind me made it all come to life. For the
first time I got the most real and visual picture of my Savior
as an infant nestled in a manger. The smooth soft glow of a
infants cheek.
Then one of the young teen boys began to read The Christmas
Story. My aching heart began to ease, as words from the past
once again became present in my heart. The infant in the
manger began to fill a place in my heart that no other infant at
the moment could fill. A place of loneliness and sadness. It
was filled with Joy and Peace.
It's just like that simple brown box I received in the mail.
I knew that box contained something my heart desired.
I know that my God has a simple brown box waiting for me
as well. And it's contents are something my heart desires.
How do I know....for He gives us the desires of our heart.
That's what my heart longs to do tonight-to delight myself
in Him. To allow the distractions of this life drop to the
ground and bow my heart and mind before Him in sheer
reverance.
May His sweet face, his strong arms be felt in your heart
this Christmas...May He unfold more of the dreams He
has for our lives on us all this New Year...
Thank you for walking this journey of life with me.
Merry Christmas to all....and much love from my heart
to yours.

Well, it's 10:00 a.m. on this fine Saturday morning. My breakfast
is consisting right now of a bag of green and red M&M's. Really!
So, I thought I'd post before you guys thought a Christmas Elf had
kidnapped me...LOL! I thought I would share a couple of
Christmas photos...

This is the picture from my Christmas header. This is the tree at
my parents house. Every year there seems to be a new stocking
being added. Next year there will be a new one with the name of
my new niece! I look forward to her arrival this Spring!

I received a Christmas package in the mail the first of the week

and my nephew was with me when I got it. I read the message

on the box outloud.."Don't open till Christmas". To which I

replied how much I wanted to open it "now". My nephew said,

"But you can't open it now". "Why not?" I

asked. "It's because of the Spirit of Christmas!", he answered.

In the "Spirit of Christmas" I wish you and your family a very

Merry Christmas! May the meaning of Christmas fill your hearts

in a special way. I pray God bless you all with special moments

this Christmas that you can tuck away as treasured memories!

Much love to you all!!!

Melanie~

Joy of the Season

I wish I could describe my mood lately. It's a really weird

combination of quiet and a bit withdrawn. What makes it

weird to me is that it's not from being down or blue. It's

almost like sitting back and watching things going on around

you. Today was a bit emotional as we gals tend to be at least

once a month ;( Anyway, we dropped off a package today

and I wanted to share the moment with you....

The other day we were in the mall and we picked a name

off the Salvation Army Christmas tree. We decided on a

little boy the same age as my nephew, we wanted him to

help us pick out the gifts we would buy. (I'm going to tear

up again) When we got home we explained to him why

we were going to buy toys for a little boy name Joshua.

Hmm...yeah, his name is Joshua...not a coincidence

for me. Anyway, when my nephew found out we were

to drop of the gifts for Joshua....he said, "cool, we can

drop them off and then I can play with him!". He was

sooo excited when he exclaimed this. Yet a bit

disappointed that he couldn't actually give it to Joshua.

It just warmed my heart to know that he wanted to

not only give a gift but sit down and enjoy the

company of what he would consider "a new friend".

I so wish the Ladies of our church would catch a bit of

this....the joy of giving, receiving and sharing things of

"real" quality with one another!

I also thought about the "gift" that He gave to us! And

I'm so glad the He didn't want to give it anonymously!

He wanted to stick around and play!!

God has also blessed me with some wonderful...

wonderful friendships this year...I'm so grateful!

You Girls...you warm my heart!

Hi....still here!

Hey all....I know, I know it's been another week and I've yet
to post. It's been sooooo crazy around here. No, not a bad
crazy just too much going on. Too much going on at work,
church and thoughts chasing around in my head...oh along
with Christmas shopping. Please help me pray about our
church...there's a situation going on and it's not too good and
it has to be handled in the right way....many details but
please say a prayer for our little pastor and his wife. Thanks!

Well, going to crawl inbetween the kids to watch Charlie
Brown Christmas special and sneak food off their plates...
hey their not eating it ;)

I know this is short but wanted to let you know I'm thinking
of you and love you all.

Just a little funny...

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

frostbite!

I owe my BIL a thank you for helping me look at the spirit of

the day a bit different....thanks for the call and the laugh...

Well, another holiday has come and gone. And as I always do,
ate wayyy too much. I hope your day was as great as mine!
The house was full of family, food, laughter, kiddos and sale
papers (which were empty of anything I had to get up this
morning to go get).
We did something different this year and I wanted to share
it with you. I've always wanted us to go around and tell
what we were thankful for. There are normally so many of
us I've just never done it.

Well, this year we did a Thankful Tree! I was planning to
just have it there for the kids to do but my Aunt's got into
it and made each of their grown kids join in. Along with my
Grandmother and my parents. It really turned cute. Now,
I have a keepsake from everyone. Like my Grandmother's
list in her handwritting with her name signed to it.

I love my nephew's he summed it all up in one big word "everything"!
The top pick on most of the kids list was "food". I blamed on the fact
they were eagerly awaiting a taste of all the wonderful smells coming
through the house.



So tonight we will take the Thankful Tree down and put up the
Christmas Tree. It's time to "Deck the Halls".
Blessing to you Sweet Friends!! May your Thankful Tree
overflow again next year!!

Oh, not on this day

Well, as most of you have heard me talk of how Thanksgiving
is my most favorite holiday ever....well, someone else heard
me talking about it too. As a matter a fact he was standing
next to my bed this morning to be the first person to great
me on MY favorite holiday of the year. Yeap the sneaky
rat himself, satan. So I've decided to make another
thankful list...to shut him up from the crap he's trying to
lay on me today...

I'm thankful that my God is "bigger than the boogie man".
I'm thankful that all I had to do this morning was close my
eyes back and talk with my Creator whom I was created in
the likeness of.
I'm thankful that in a few hours that the house will be full
of kids laughter. We are going to make a Thankful Tree
today...so I should have pictures up of it soon.

If satan showed up that early this morning then...
It's going to be a good day Ladies! A good day indeed!
Many Happy Warm Blessings to you today!

Happy Thanksgiving!

This little guy has the right idea...

Praise the Lord and pass the turkey!

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday! There is something special
about it that warms my heart. Our Thanksgiving day isn't as
crowded with people as it use to be. Be it some of our loved ones
are spending it with Jesus or that ones have houses to juggle
between. Still it's not that...it's the reason of the holiday I love.
It's always been an extra time that I sit still and reflect back on
all God's goodness in my life.
I could keep an ongoing list of things I'm thankful for and we
would be here all day talking about them. I will name a few...
I'm thankful for being raised in a Christian home.
I'm thankful for the gift of salvation my Savior provided.
I'm thankful for God's provision.
I'm thankful for my parents, sisters and my nephew and niece.
I'm thankful for family.
I'm thankful for friends. The kind that feel like family.
I'm thankful for a second chance on life.
I'm thankful for the tough times too.

I'm thankful that God has crossed our paths!
You have all been a special treasure give to me from above.
Thinking of you all this Thanksgiving....
May your day be a beautiful reminder of all He has done
in your life.

Planting seeds...

Hey! I've been beaming from ear to ear since last night.
Why?? Well, Ladies we have a new sister in Christ!
Some of you have heard me talk about our Fall Festival we
had at church in October. Well, we put in a lot of hard work,
countless hours and much much prayer. We have had four
families visit our church as a result of the event. Now, we
are in a very small rural church and this is a big number for
us. Well, some have been in and out since but most are
still coming. There is this one particular lady that's been
coming with her two young girls ever since. On Sunday
night our youth group lead the service, which I love by
the way because it's the only time there is any praise and
worship music....that's a whole other post for some time
later. Anyway, they did this skit by a group called
Lighthouse. If I were computer savy and had time to
figure it out I would put up the video. This lady was
sitting on the opposite end of the aisle as me and my
sister. I caught her out of the corner of my eye and
got my sister attention to glance too. It was the coolest
sight because she was leaning forward just amazed at what
she was watching. Later on that night the preacher's
wife, who is also an amazing friend that God has
brought my way, called and said I need you to help me
pray for this lady tonight because she was talking to me
after church. So that was Sunday night...well last
night (Monday) I get another phone call from the
preacher's wife...Amanda, and she asked me what I
was doing. I replied eating why? To which she says
could you come go somewhere with me. I say sure...
where are we going? The lady called her last night
and said she wanted to get baptized! Amanda is like...
what?!!? did I miss something yesterday? The lady
was like...well I asked Christ to come into my heart
and I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders
and everything is just different. Well me on the
phone is soooo pumped up!!! Amanda swings into
the drive way and we are off to deliever a Bible to
our new sister in Christ!! We had a nice visit with
her and an amazing prayer time. Please help us
pray for her she has had such an amazingly hard
time. Her life has been turned upside down in the
last few years. Pray for us as a church to come
along side her and love and disciple her.
I've been thinking of a song today....not sure I
think it's Casting Crowns that sings a song called
If We Are the Body...and it says if we are the
Body why aren't our arms reaching....
Oh, how true of us today....I'm so bad about not
doing His work and missing oppurtunities He
sets before me sometimes.
I have a friend that I work with who is attending
our Bible study right now....Please help me pray....
I want her to be our next sister in Christ.....

The things I love most...

I ran across this Meme over at Sharon's and
thought I would give it a try. I'm suppose to
list 5 things I love. So, I thought
I would do it count down style...

#5 I love learning new things. For example,
I love discovering new things with the kids I
work with. To research things of nature that's
hindering them and designing a program that
teach's them a new skill or way to communicate.
In the same sense...I love discovering new
things about God and His Word and Will.

#4 I love ballcaps! The first thing I do when I
walk in the door from work is put on my cap.
I carry them in my car a lot and most days put
it on before I even leave work. When I'm taking
photos my cap is on and turned around backwards.
When I was young my dad would tell me "turn that
cap around you look like a punk". Haha...I'd do it
then just because it bothered him.

#3 Photography! I had a photography class my
Senior year of college and it was amazing! I
discovered my favorite Photographer then.
Ansel Adams. The photo below is the first one of
his I fell in love with.

#2 I love nature!! I love being outdoors.

I love being in the woods around our place.

If you remember a former post of

mine you'll recall the family ties it has.

Most important it makes me feel so close to my

Creator.

#1 I love these Kiddos! Of course,

my niece and nephew. Bman and Emmy G.

and the little Girl to come....I love you guys

the most!!

Well folks...it's Official! I'm a college student again!! I can't believe it!

I went today and filled out my admission papers and paid the

admission fee. The first check of many yet to write.

So, here is what the future should look like...

I am planning to continue out the school year working where I am now.

Along with taking two classes this Spring, these classes will start in Jan.

I hope to quit work at the end of the school year and just go to school

next Summer. Like I said in my last post, I have to make straight A's

in order to get through this stage of classes. Then I hope to pass all

three of the big test (GRE, Praxis I and Praxis II) by the end of the

Summer and all my paper work done so that I can be admitted into

the Graduate program this Fall. In the program I'll be doing student

teaching during the day and taking classes in the evening. One good

thing is you get paid in the school system while you student teach!!

Whew! It all sounds just that easy...hahaha!

All the way down to the campus this morning my stomach was tied

in knots. A good nervous but nervous none the less. I know that

this is what God is asking me to do. I have to be honest...I know I

can learn the things I need to know but I'm sooooo nervous at the

thought of being in charge of a classroom. There is also the fear

of not getting a job in the end. I've watched so many women lately

struggle to find a job in teaching. I know God is in control and He

wouldn't ask me to do something unless He had it all planned out.

You may have to remind me of that later =)

Okay, I guess it's time to put it all in practice and go get some

more studying done.....

Love you!

Study hall

First of all I hope you enjoy my study down time music!
In the spirit of my study break I thought I'd share this
email I received today....


How to Fail tests with dignity!

Well, on a serious note..

I finally spoke with someone at the school today! I've felt so scattered in

all the things I knew I needed to do to get back into school. I just didn't

know all the steps to take and when to take them. Well, my conversation

today did just that. Ms. Greer gave me a step by step "plan" and I'm

ready to go! I will go tomorrow and enroll once more to the university.

Like I told the lady on the phone today... I know I have a lot of work to

do...but I'm ready. My eye has been set on the goal for a long time

and now it's time to get moving. I know what needs to be done and I'm

ready to roll up my sleeves and get busy!!

Last nights prayers and God's answer today from this phone conversation

has brought some major peace to my heart and mind today!!

When the school bell rings again I don't know what this will mean

as far as Blogland goes....

I know you all understand. The last few weeks have been tough

and my discipline was not too hot. However, the classes I'm having

to take in order to get into the graduate program requires me to

only make A's!!!!! Girls, I'm not a good student so this is going to

be a huge challenge!! So, my plans are to not go anywhere I just

may not be here as much....but I'm here.

I love you all!! Thanks for all your prayers and support!

Always know that you are forever in my thoughts and prayers.

Thoughts...

Last Saturday I decided to take a few photos of the Fall trees
around the house. I picked them up at lunch today and looked
at them while eating my Hotpocket...The first photo reminded
me of how sad I was at first because the leaves didn't have
much color and they just looked dead. Then God took my
thoughts on a bit of a journey....thought I would share....

The leaves all looked dull and dead. However, if you keep moving
and looking then you'll find an angle...

A place where the sun is in just the right spot that...

At that particular place and moment the leaves glow with splendor just

like the One that created them....

He reminded me if I keep moving and looking through His view of things...

His angle is from above so totally different than the view we see. If we

just keep looking we'll soon see as the Son shines through...

The deadness of life will disappear and the Splendor of the One
who created us will shine through....

He makes everything glow with life....eternal life.

What would we miss?

Interrupting this "blogging" break for a moment to share
something that totally impacted my world this week.
"For such a time as this..." Of all times we could have
done the Daniel Bible study it was now! After the election
I felt as most of you I'm sure did. Low and behold what
is the next nights homework?? Week 6! God was quick
to show me that Daniel lived in one if not the most
corrupt cultures but he faithfully served God in those
times. Even in the midst of ungodly leadership Daniel
remained faithful in a corrupt world.

Ok, the other thing...she asks....
"What kind of things would Daniel and his friends have
missed had they chosen instead to blend in?"
WOW! So then I turned the question around to
myself....Melanie what would you have missed out on?
God's provision. Healing. College. A world called Autism.
Right now in the midst of the journey- what will the
outcome look like...I don't know but what I do know is
that whatever it is...I don't want to miss it!!

What would you have missed out on?

Love you....me.

I have to start this off by saying THANK YOU!

Thank you so much for the support, love and prayers you

sent my way after my last post!!

You guys mean the world to me...

which makes this post and the discipline that's

going to come with it difficult.

As you guys know I'm planning to take the GRE test to

see if going back to school is the next step in God's plan for me.

I haven't studied now in several weeks. The computer is my

mindless distraction...so...for the next couple of weeks

I'm not going to be able to visit in Blogland.

I am allowing myself to check emails though.

I get so much support and love here but it's the

"roaming" time that is using time that could be used for

studying. You have know idea how hard this is to type...

I've been so focused on the dreams that I'm neglecting the work

that needs to get done to reach those places.

I need to stop day dreaming and stay focused in the present

and get things done.

The reason I stopped studying weeks ago was because I

was getting very overwhelmed...when it gets that bad it

tends to spin me out of control inside. That is something

I'm very afraid of. I'm facing some really big fears right now.

I'm really allowing fear to plant roots again and I need to go

tend to that....

Thanks again for your love and prayers!!

I'll see you guys around Thanksgiving!!

Miss you already...HUGS...tight hugs!!!

Don't get distracted from life by focusing on worries, fears or

even dreams.....

Trading Dreams...

This is a dress I found a few months ago. I always wondered what my wedding
dress would ever look like- seeing how I'm not really a girlie girl. When I ran
across this dress my heart fell in love with it. The trim around the top is
chocolate brown which is one of my favorite colors. Anyway, seeing things
like this and with the holidays around the corner...it tends to bring about a
bit of the blues for me. Now...please...please don't let this sound like my voice
or heart is having a pity party or anything. I'm just trying to gear myself up
to make it through the holidays...which are the only times that being single
bothers me. The following is a piece of an email I shared with someone last
week. I'm really posting this to remind myself of what I have always tried
to hold on to.

There was someone a year ago that I just knew was the "one". We had served many many years ago in the youth ministry together. I have in my dreams always wanted to marry someone in the ministry. He and his wife divorced two years ago. I have always admired his walk with God. We talked a couple of times and actually went out with another couple. I just knew he was the one....I prayed so hard over it. God's answer...well I'm still single. However, saying all that I trust God...and that trust is growing every day. He is my provision and my joy. I long for Him to be that....my Prince. I have this dream of every little girls dream wedding, to be a wife and mother and a house with the white picket fence. So what do I do with what seems like an unanswered dream...trade it in for His! Last night I almost allowed some unhealthy thoughts to trickle in...I'm so glad I'm in a place right now in my walk to be able to shut those thoughts down.

I think about Mary as she agrees to accept the plans God had for her to carry
out His plans. After her agreement...all her plans seemed lost. Her soon to
be Joseph plans to leave and the reputation she carried looks ruined in others
eyes. I can't imagine what Mary's life and walk with God must have looked
like. But what a wonderful example she gives of tading in her comfort and
desires to fulfill God's.

My faith has it's ups and downs...and I'm gearing up...hunkering down...
and digging in to God's Word and the truth that He has plans for me (Jer. 29:11).
Keeping my head up looking at our Groom....
Thanks for listening...

No Smell of Fire

Okay Girls...I'm not a girlie girl but for this post I thought
it be fitting to do it in PINK...as most of you know I'm
going to be an Aunt again...yep...


IT'S A GIRL!!!!!

Okay can you stand a bit of PRAISE?????

Some of you remember the first of the year I asked you

to help me pray for my friend LeaAnn...she is only in her

fourties and they found cancer...WELL...she went back to

New York this week I just received word that they got back

the results today...SHE HAS NO...NO TUMORS!!!

Praise you Jesus!!! HE is the Most High God and He is sooo

AMAZING!!! Oh thank you Lord...thank you!!

As some of you know I'm in the middle of the Daniel study

by Mrs. Beth Moore. I keep coming back to so many

things I have learned...but there is one that keeps coming

back. It is from the session "No Smell of Smoke". It's the

three Scenarios that people face when faced by a fiery trial.

Scenario A: We can be delievered from the fire.

Scenario B: We can be delievered through the fire.

Scenario C: We can be delievered by the fire straight into His arms.

Now, I need to ask you join me once again for another prayer

request...thank you in advance. A precious friend of mine has

found out her 82 year old dad has cancer. It is already in stage

four. He says he's had a wonder 82 years and doesn't plan to

start any kind of treatments. However, I want to pray for

another scenario B. Also, Linda at Growin With It...her dad

is facing reaccuring cancer (Linda hope you don't mind me

mentioning this). Something amazing happens when the Body

of Christ come together before the throne!

"Do not be anxious about ANYTHING, but in EVERYTHING,

by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your

request to God". Philippians 4:6

I was talking with a friend tonight and a quote that I had once

read came to mind. It was about five years ago when I was

sitting in the lobby of a couseling center that a framed

cross stitch caught my eye. I can't remember the exact quote

but it went something like this....

A stain glass window can't shine unless...there is darkness all

around...and the light that makes it glow has to come from

within.

That quote carried some heavy impact on me in those days

and it still does today.

As a sat there later on thinking about it I remembered

another set of stain glass windows. The former church I

was attending had a sanctuary surrounded by such windows.

However, I never knew it until the church caught on fire.

The people started talking about rebuilding and about how

they wish they could put the stain glass windows back. See

they were there all along...but years ago they were boarded

up framed in on the inside and bricked up on the outside....

Tonight thinking back on that it brings thoughts.

How much are "we" like that at times. We are this beautiful

stain glass window that our Creator formed. He sets us in

place... We experience things and we frame up the inside.

Other things happen and we brick in the outside. For

protection? To keep from having to go out? But non-the-

less...what a shame....a beautiful creation hidden. Unable

to do what it was created for. To let the light of the One

who created it to shine through. If it weren't for the Light

the window would have no beauty....

In order for the church to regain the view of the windows...

there were many things they had to go through. The pain

and shock of what had happened. Going through the

remains of the building to see what had been lost. The

worry from the financial strain of rebuilding. Were would

they hold service's until the rebuild...and oh my... the

rebuild. A seeming for ever long process.

To exspose the beauty of who He created us to be is also

a seemingly long rebuilding process. There may be things

we have to loose, things that would have to be torn down

so He can rebuild, allowing Him to put on a fresh new coat

of paint within the walls of our hearts.

I know there are many of us who feel we are at the moment

in the dark. It feels like we are just feeling around not to

stumble and fall. The darkness can be so pitch black at

times we feel so afraid and alone but we are not. The

Light is there in us waiting for the right time to shine.

When He does it will be when He will be the only thing

receiving the Glory...not the window or the building it

sets in...the Light. The flame is there and it's lit...I

think it's called Hope. Hold on to the lampstand...

Hemmed in...

This evening I was walking and my nephew was riding his toy
jeep down the driveway with me. When he got to the end, he
started yelling my name. It scared me at first I thought he may
have seen a snake or something. I quickened my pace as I
yelled back "what?!". He said "look at the moon! It's beautiful!"
Yes sir, you are right it is beautiful indeed! (I tried to take a
photo but it didn't take) As we turned around and headed
back up the driveway...I saw something else beautiful going on
in the sky. A huge full moon was coming up on one side of the
sky...while in the same moment...the other side of the sky was
full of a sunset...both moments to take your breath away in
beauty. It looked and felt as if I were standing in the middle
of the two....
It was as if God was saying He had me hemmed in on all
sides. It also reminded me of how much He loved me
and this scripture came to mind....



"...to grasp how wide and long and high and deep
is the love of Christ, and to know this love that
surpasses knowledge that you may be filled to
the measure of all the fullness of God." Eph. 3:18-19



I pray tonight you feel Him all around you...He is...

A little view of my world...

Sharon and I were talking the otherday about how neat
it would be to see where the other lived. So we decided
to take some snapshots and give a tour around.

This is the big Oak Tree that is in my Grandmother's
yard. Honestly this is only part of it I could get the
whole thing in view.

This is the view just down the road from our house.
The sun just beams through in the mornings.

The pictures below were taken today with my cell phone.

Now, some I was stopped for and yes some I admit I was

driving. Hey, it's illegal to text message and drive- I heard

nothing about taking pictures!

Now, this would be a good way to throw in a hint to my

family that a digital camera for Christmas would be nice!

Okay, this is a picture of the sunrise I saw this morning

driving into work.

This is a picture of my church. It's just as beautiful on the

inside. The school is directly across the road from the

church and when I was in the 5th grade the original church

burned to the ground. We were in school when it happened...

such an amazingly sad site. God has blessed us though...

The next two pictures are 20 miles of the 35 mile commute that I

drive to work (it is 35 miles oneway). Yes, this is also the same

road that the rock flew into my window on my birthday and it's

also the same road that Mr. Policeman stopped me to say "Hi"

and "Slow Down".

This is a picture of the kiddo's running up the driveway...

No...I was not driving behind them in the car...hahaha.

"Home Sweet Home"

If I disappear, get quiet or don't post for awhile...

this is why!!!! This is a picture of JUST one of the THREE

stacks of study cards I have floating around with me

everywhere I go!!! I'm studying hard Girls! I'm taking the

GRE at the end of the year in hopes to go back to school

the Spring of next year. God's will is the only way!!

Hope you enjoyed your trip along with me!

You guys are the Best Traveling Companions ever!!

let's have some fun...whatcha say...

I LOVE this time of the year!!!! The Fall is my favorite
season. I love the temperature change. It just makes me
feel good inside! It was mentioned to me the other day
about having fun. This week that thought has been on my
mind...having fun. It had been such a long summer and
things were a bit disappointing and so the season
changed. Praise the Lord!! Yesterday I was able to grab
my camera and take some photos for a friend of her
family. I must say that was so much fun to me. I love
capturing things with my camera. That is something
fun I love.
God has also sent something unexpected my way...
a new friend. There is nothing like it. It's our preacher's
wife. They have three kiddo's that are under our feet
and I love it. The kids call me Aunt M just like my own
do. This summer she asked me to help with the Ladies
Ministry and we had a ball!! This is so much fun to me.
This year God has introduced me to you Girls! I have
loved getting to know you guys and doing life with you.
I have found amazing friends here and faithful prayer
warriors! You my friends are some kind of fun to me!!
Then we have this Amazing amazing Father God in
Heaven Who loves us beyond measure!! To walk out
a day in our life should be about being happy because
we have Him!!! I don't know about you but I'm ready
to have some fun....we are the child of the King...we
are allowed to have some fun!!

moments with Him...

On the mountain top with Jesus...what a wonderful place to be!

It would be nice to stay there forever...wouldn't it?! My thoughts

are here today after reading O. Chambers. Here's what he had to

say...

"We have all had times on the mount, when we have seen things from God's standpoint and have wanted to stay there; but God will never allow us to stay there. The test of our spiritual life is the power to descend; if we have power to rise only, something is wrong. It is a great thing to be on the mount with God, but a man only gets there in order that afterwards he may get down among the devil-possessed and lift them up. We are not built for the mountains and the dawns and aesthetic affinities, those are for moments of inspiration, that is all. We are built for the valley, for the ordinary stuff we are in, and that is where we have to prove our mettle. Spiritual selfishness always wants repeated moments on the mount. We feel we could talk like angels and live like angels, if only we could stay on the mount. The times of exaltation are exceptional, they have their meaning in our life with God, but we must beware lest our spiritual selfishness wants to make them the only time.

We are apt to think that everything that happens is to be turned into useful teaching, it is to be turned into something better than teaching, viz., into character. The mount is not meant to teach us anything, it is meant to make us something. There is a great snare in asking - What is the use of it? In spiritual matters we can never calculate on that line. The moments on the mountain tops are rare moments, and they are meant for something in God's purpose."

I thought about the scripture in Matthew 17 where Peter, James

and John had the amazing chance to be on top of the mountain

when Jesus transfigured before them with Moses and Elijah.

Remember Peter's words..."Lord, it is good for us to be here...".

Oh, yeah Peter it's good to be there and I'd love to stay and

enjoy a longer stay with Him. He and I have work to do down

in the valley. When we discover the rough or the ordinary

time have a purpose it makes it so much easier to put one

foot in front of the other.

I love what Mr. Chamber says about the mountain

top moments are meant to make us something. God please

mold me and make me what You have me be.

a moment in time...

Two friends
Two prayer warriors
With clasped hands tight in urgency
So tight that the feel of heartbeats are felt
Heartbeats of both physical and spiritual
Two hearts crying out for Him
One God Who bends down to hear
Two hearts crying out for Him
One God bends down and touches
Two hearts that are crying out to Him
In urgency they pray
In urgency He responds
m.c.

If you read my last post you'll know that last weekend was a
rough one for me. Like I said in that last post...the thing going
on last weekend is a thing that God has left in my life to remind
me that it's Him I need. Not that we don't need each other
because we do! That's the way God created us. I've been
praying about posting this particular post....some heart to heart
talks require energy. There are just somethings like this that
drain you to walk back through. That's why I decided to take
some time off from blogging to regain some energy from last
weekend. Satan is crazy if he thinks I'm going to forget God
and I already one this thing!!!
I'd like to share first the devotion that God prepared for me
to receive on Monday...yeah the day after I decided to stand
firm in the victory already won....


Please Don't Leave!
Marybeth Whalen

"Do not leave here, I pray You, until I return to You and bring my offering and set it before You. And He said, I will wait until you return."
Judges 6:18 (AMP)

Devotion:
My two year-old daughter has learned a new phrase that tugs at my heart. Whether I am going on a date with my husband, or walking out of the room after putting her to bed, or just running quickly to the library to return books, I hear the same thing: "Mommy, don't leave me!" As she has gotten older and more aware of both my presence and my absence, she is much quicker to express the desperate feeling she experiences when I am not with her. She responds with a heartfelt cry--one that is not unique to a two year-old. Whether we are saying it to our spouse, our children, or our friends, we all know that desperate feeling of not wanting to be left.

It is no different in our walk with God. In the story of Gideon, we see him wrestling with many issues that we wrestle with today. Did God really ask me to do that? Am I capable? Am I worthy? Do I have what it takes? And we see him reacting as I think many of us do. We look to God in the midst of our wrestling and say, just like my two year-old, "Don't leave me while I sort this out!"

The more we walk with Him, the more aware we become of the benefits of resting in His presence. We know what we receive from Him and we crave more. We have felt the warmth of His embrace and we want more time in His lap. We know the power only He can infuse us with and we want to stay connected to that. And yet, as we scurry about in our busy lives, we are likely to look over and accuse Him of leaving us--when really it is the other way around.

I love God's response to Gideon as he desperately cries out for Him not to leave. Very lovingly and patiently God replies, "I'll be right here." I see God saying the same thing to all of us today. As you race to pick up your child at school, you call out over your shoulder, "Don't leave me!" As you rush off to work, your mind filled with the things you need to do, you say to Him, "Please don't leave God!" As you carry out the things He has called you to, needing Him more than ever, He lovingly replies, "Go do what you need to do, and I will be right here." The New American Standard version of this verse says, "I will remain until you return." He is a God who remains.

Gideon's story comforts me not because he went on to fight a victorious battle and become a hero in Israel. Gideon's story comforts me because he knew he needed the Lord and he understood his profound need for God's presence. He experienced an abiding relationship with God that became his foundation and his fortress. I love knowing that when I desperately call out, "Don't leave me!" He will lovingly reply, "I'm not going anywhere." Every time.

I have read the story of Gideon many times...but never caught verse 18.
Each of us has a very unique personality...it's like the color of His creation.
The Psychology major in me wants to tell you about each different one
but we would be here awhile. I think the understanding though of the
different personalities would help us all in our reactions and resposes to
another. Anyway, let's get back to Gideon...;)
The title of this devotion just says it all "Please Don't Leave!"
It just plays across that chord in my heart that plays deep urgency.
The thing God and I walked through was a deep seeded fear of
abandonment. I've always asked and wondered...why this was the
thing I had to walk through. So it was and so I...now...am.
See my Mom passed down to me the thing that was passed down
to her from her mom. A heavy spirit of depression. Not even as
a child do I remember not wearing it. I would go through a whole
school day and not speak a single word...to anyone. Not a teacher
or another student. I had a teacher in the 1st grade that would
get me by the shoulders and literally shake me to answer her.
I was when I became an older teen that I began to pray about this
thing that at first I called shyness. The battle got bad as I entered
my early 20's. If it had not been for my mustard seed size faith
in a mighty God that claimed He loved me I'd never made those
teenage and ealy adult years. It was when I turned 30 that I'd
had all I could handle. That's when the facedown prayers began.
God and I walked hand in hand through many self-help books and
counseling sessions....and we made it.
There were two life changing realizations that came. One was
when I was finally able to forgive my Mom....forgivenss only spoken
in the heart. I tried forgiving her over and over in my heart but it
never came so I could let go. Until I understood the fact that she
couldn't be the "mother" because all she was able to do each day
was keep her head above the water. When I heard God speak that
to my heart...I let go and forgave. And a change began to enter my
life for the first time.
The other thing that happened was a very vivid picture God painted
in my mind oneday. I could see it as clear as a picture I had taken
with my own camera. I saw this 7 or 8 year old girl with long brown
hair that almost touched her waist. She was behind a waist high wall
bent down in the "tornado drill" position. I knew this little girl...she
was me. When that little girl would come home from school some
days her mom would either have her bag backed or talk about doing
it and claim when daddy came home she was leaving. How was that
little girl to know that that day would actually never come. To me it
seemed to be a day that would come it would happen. As God showed
me that little girl....He let me know that I was taking care of everyone...
Mom, sisters and keeping the peace....but that I had forgotten to take
care of me. I was in my late 20's with no friends...in my early 30's with
no family of my own. He helped me start the long journey of opening
up and allowing people to come into my life and love on me. I
described it someone last weekend as this...someone's house burns to
the ground and they build a new one. Then when it's time to move in
they don't decorate it because they are afraid of losing everything
again. There is such a fear isn't it of opening up, investing and trusting
in another.
There is One though that has assured us in His Word that He will never
change and never leave us. I'm so grateful for being brought up in the
church. I never worried about God leaving. I often worry about my
wondering away....if anyone moves it's us.

I pray that if there is something that you and God have walked
through and gained victory over that you/we want allow satan to
shake that knowledge. I pray that if there is something you and
God need to walk through to gain victory over-that you find the
courage and strength to.

Thanks for listening...

In my last post I quoted the third line of the old hymn
Rescue the Perishing. That line was brought to my
attention in a sermon our pastor gave a couple of weeks
ago. I'd like to share some of it with you...


"On a Sabbath Jesus was teaching in one of the
synagogues, and a woman was there who had been
crippled by a spirit for eighteen years. She was bent
over and could not straighten up at all. When Jesus
saw her, he called forward and said to her, "Women
you are set free from your infirmity." Then he put
his hands on her, and immediately she straightened
up and praised God." Luke 13:10-13


The woman had a hurt in her life...a burden, problem
a load. There was a spirit of weakness that was
emotional in nature. Satan had used this weakness
and bound her. She was bound to the point she bent
over and couldn't straighten up. Just like us satan
bends us lower and lower until just as she we reach
the point we are unable to look up and see the blue
sky, a sunset or the eyes of others. When you are in
this shape you can't even see all the wonderful things
He has for you. This state can bring about bitterness,
depression and negativity. She couldn't straighten up,
I can imagine like some of us she had tried so many
times. She had hope though because...it was the
Sabbath day and Jesus was there! She knew He
could meet her need. He touches broken people...
Allow Jesus to touch the broken areas of your life.


Girls, through that whole sermon I was saying in my
heart...Thank You Jesus...Thank You Jesus!!
See I was hearing the story of my life echoing back
through this woman's story. That woman was me
over five years ago. I was in my second year back
in college. At the age of 31 when God and I began
this journey of healing. I want to share with you
how the beginning stage of the journey started. I
knew that I was cycling back through another round.
I knew this time that I couldn't handle another one.
I began to beg and pray at the foot of the church
alter and at the foot of my bed for God to please help
me. The "Faithful Summer" at youth camp...He told
me if I would lay it down this time we would walk it
out. And we did...five long years but we did it.
However, this past weekend satan tried to attack that
area of weakness in my life again. Even though God
and I overcame many things in my life, I think this
area of my life will be the "thorn in my flesh" that
He will leave to remind me that it's Him that I must
depend on.
There were seasons in my life I thought I would
never overcome...but then there was an eye opening
Sabbath day where Jesus came and touch me and
hope became a reality.

I think this past weekend was a wake up for me and
I realized that God is wanting to spend some time
with me...and I've been craving Him too. So if I'm
quiet for the next few days...I'm just going to be
hanging out with my Jesus! I'll be praying for you
while I'm there.....Love you Girls!!!!!