Available...

Have you ever felt like you've just fallen through the cracks and

nobody has noticed? God took me through that stage when I was

in college. I started missing church...and just a lot of other things.

I've always been open and honest here. And since there have

been only a few of you stick with me...and I love you by the way...

I don't see any need in worrying about anything I say after I

hit publish post.

I have to admit I've gotten very very addicted to facebook.

However, I am getting to catch up on some very old friends.

I was just hanging out the other day and sitting idle on my

facebook page when I noticed some of the settings I was

looking at. Like...Online friends, you have a friend request-

confirm or ignore, no one is available to chat, other

request...oh and we can't forget...What are you doing

right now. Well duh, trying to find a connection!!

We've all read the books that quote "we were created

for relationship". And indeed that is just how He

created us.

You guys know I have my times were singleness

brings loneliness. I know even as married you to

feel loneliness. It's just a place I'm sitting in right

now. Not for a lack of not having a husband...not

sure why really it's just where I am. And it must

be a place where He wants me.

How good it feels to see a friend "online" you know

plugged into our relationship. Someone available

to chat with. How true is it that we can view

someone and choose to confirm or ignore them.

Or for someone to choose to confirm or ignore us.

I have to admit there is a couple of people that I

have felt ignored...let's call it the real word...

rejected by. Yes, one being a guy. I realize

just now that I am allowing that to confirm me...

Reconfirming some old lies that satan once

made me believe about myself. And confirming

to me that God wants me to Himself.

You know what guys...I took that photo one

day when I got in from work...I never thought

about what caught my attention in it till now...

The thing that feel between the crack...It's growing!

(this is my Granddaddy's Bible)

Thank you for accepting my friend request!

For being available to chat!

LOL...

Love you!

In the Eye of the Storm

I know it's been almost two weeks...sorry for being such
a bad host.
I've been doing a bit of this....

And a bit of this...need to be doing much more of this one...

But for the last two weeks....there's not a picture to describe it...

so words will have to do.

Here in Blog land we tend to share our hearts and lives. Maybe

not in straight forward words but in spoken heart to heart

words. We share in times of Sunshine and in times of Shade.

Even though we are miles apart...to a certain point we can

feel and walk with each other through it all. I was thinking

about it like this last week. We can hear the weather forecast

all around the world. We can hear the weather forecast in

each others state. For me it's been almost summer like

temps, for some of you winter temps, some of you hit by

strong thunder storms. But I can't actually feel the cold

you are experiencing or feel the electric feeling in the air

in the middle of the thunderstorm. I can hear the forecast,

I can hear your stories about them, and you can hear

mine. But at some season or time you and I have felt

the others "seasonal weathers".

Some of the storms each of you ride out or have rode

out....some I may understand...some I won't...

I am/haven't rode out the storm of bipolar...but now

and then I catch a breeze of it.

I'm in the storm of a thing called autism...I feel strong

gusts but not sure I've felt the full intensity of the storm.

But no matter what the storm is...when it comes to it

being in your family...you feel the full brunt of it all.

This is where I've been the last few weeks....

You know what? God is teaching me something so

amazing and it's something I couldn't learn minus

the storm. He is teaching me that in the Storm can

be a beautiful thing. I've been praying for His

protection around a couple people I love. And He

showed me first hand the other day just how much

He is answering that prayer. Praise your Name....

For the last couple years God continues to draw me

back to Nehemiah when he is rebuilding the walls.

I was thinking about as families we are in charge of

rebuilding the walls right in front of us. At how

Satan gets so mad at our faithfulness and attacks

our work and progress. If we are working and facing

the wall with work materials in one hand and our

Weapons in the other....sometimes he can find

someone on the inside of the wall to use and fire

an unsuspected attack. I think this is the part

He and I are on right now. How to handle the

battle that's being fought within the wall. How

to fight and not get wounded by the fiery flames.

Who the real enemy is. And how to pray for

the one being used in the wrong hands. And how

not to be pulled down by the heaviness of the

enemy at hand. This student is ready to learn

and she is listening for the Teacher's Words to

be spoken. The Voice of Truth.

Thank you for your faithfulness in coming here

to check in on the forecast....for standing in the

gaps with me...as I hope I do for you. For

being close enough to feel the breeze pick up

from time to time. I treasue you...

Create in me a pure heart, O God,

renew a steadfast spirit within me.

Psalm 51:10

Promise of....

Hey Guys. I honestly shouldn't be trying to write this now. But....

My life right now feels like it has been turned upside down. And

I'm a bit overwhelmed. I would really almost rather you not

comment on this post because I don't want anyone to feel sorry

for me in anyway.....your prayers would be amazing. I wish I

could explain all that's going on. The reason I'm posting is

because I need to focus on some things right now and I need

to go and sit with our Papa. I don't know how long I'll be gone...

I just know as in my photo above that God promises us new life.

But know I treasure you and will carry you in my heart and

prayers.....I love you all.

Ouch...This one hurt

"Take no thought for your life." Matthew 6:25



"Take no thought for your life." "Be careful about one thing only," says our Lord - "your relationship to Me." Common sense shouts loud and says - "That is absurd, I must consider how I am going to live, I must consider what I am going to eat and drink." Jesus says you must not. Beware of allowing the thought that this statement is made by One Who does not understand our particular circumstances. Jesus Christ knows our circumstances better than we do, and He says we must not think about these things so as to make them the one concern of our life. Whenever there is competition, be sure that you put your relationship to God first.
"Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof." How much evil has begun to threaten you to-day? What kind of mean little imps have been looking in and saying - Now what are you going to do next month - this summer? "Be anxious for nothing," Jesus says. Look again and think. Keep your mind on the "much more" of your heavenly Father. -Oswald Chambers

Provision

"The LORD will open the heavens, the storehouse of his bounty, to send rain on your land in season and to bless all the work of your hands" (Deut 28:12).

I had an interesting conversation the other day with a five year

old. He made a comment to which I replied, "If we don't praise

Him the rocks will". I have to say that if I don't praise Him the

rocks are about to cry out.

When I made the decision to go back to school the thought

of income never entered my mind. Until I began to figure

up my hours and then a bit of panic set in. And I have to tell

you my God is True to His Word! When I paid my tuition I

had to close out my savings account. After the tuition check

cleared the bank I should have been left with only 50 dollars

in the bank. Instead...it was almost 300 dollars. My last check

was the first payroll check I received since my hours
at work were cut. I was exspecting a small check. Instead...

it was a full check. I even went behind our office manger to

double check it and it was all correct. So I ended up with a

full check plus a 100 dollars extra in the bank this month!!!!!
I'm going to tell you what else this wonderful gift from my

Gracious Father did... It swept away some fears I was

hanging onto. It reminds me of Psalm 23:5
"You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies."
The last half of this verse has caught my eye and attention before.
Today the words "before me" stand out.
God has it all before me...He has the plan and the things I

need ready for me. I've had such fears as...

Will I find a job? Will I be able to handle the responsibility? Ect..

"God made a covenant with His people that provision

would always be there if we were faithful to His commands."
Os Hillman

Meaning...

A few months back I posted this picture. No words. No post
title. It was just the picture. I had several comment on telling
more about the photo. At the time I had nothing to tell. I ran
across it and something drew me to it. Tonight I found myself
remembering it and the hold it had on me.
I've had a "zone out" day today. One of those days where
something is going on and you just can't put your finger on
it. On the way home I ran the last few days through my
mind trying to place where "this" was coming from. I knew
what I was doing at the time but traced it back a little more.
Then...Wham! There it was.
I know that in areas my Spiritual walk has gone a bit deep.
Others not so yet. I know you guys are so much deeper in
your Walk with Him. I know I'm learning and growing just
as you. I'm glad you are here to spur me on. Anyway...
The first time it appeared was when a friend was talking
about a date with her husband. Then when I was talking
to two different friends that I hadn't talked to in a long
while. Then in the wonderings of another friend drifting.
Then while longing to talk to some face to face vs.
technology.

Intimacy.

Every relationship carries it's own level of uniqueness.
The "world" right now is pulling me to feel the need
for earthly initmacy when I know it's satan's way of
hiding the fact that it's intimacy with Him I need most.
When I feel the earthly desires for intimacy...I crave it.
I'm craving Him tonight...and satan is doing all he can
do to fill my mind with junk. This picture is what my
hearts longing is right now....to be in that still quiet
place with Him.
Normally on Wed. I've been doing a scripture verse
but this time I'm going to leave a chapter that God
showed me tonight. The neat thing is that verse 3
was the verse I put in my graduation inivitations.
I love that it says "when" and not if.

1 I cry aloud to the LORD;
I lift up my voice to the LORD for mercy.
2 I pour out my complaint before him;
before him I tell my trouble.
3 When my spirit grows faint within me,
it is you who know my way.
In the path where I walk
men have hidden a snare for me.
4 Look to my right and see;
no one is concerned for me.
I have no refuge; no one cares for my life.
5 I cry to you, O LORD; I say, "You are my refuge,
my portion in the land of the living."
6 Listen to my cry, for I am in desperate need;
rescue me from those who pursue me,
for they are too strong for me.
7 Set me free from my prison, that I may praise your name.
Then the righteous will gather about me
because of your goodness to me.